A Switcheroo

It’s no big secret-my parents got stupider and stupider once I turned 12. They apex-ed around my 16th, and since there was no where to go but up, they became increasingly wiser, slowly but surely until I can finally admit, they were brilliant by the time I was 25.

And P.S. It is no coincidence that at age 12, I became more and more brilliant etc…

I had wonderful parents. They were dedicated to their family, taught me to be moral, and say please and thank you. Their job was done by my12th birthday.

All the damage, I did to myself whilst I was in my most brilliant phase from 12 to 18.

I’ve had a long, long time to think about this, and I’ve had the pleasure of watching other people’s kids experience the same phenomena. (No,no, not mine). (?!)

I thought there must be some solution: A SWITCHEROO. Everyone should get a new set of parents at age 12. Preferably “cool” strangers. I think I would have done well with Elvis and Priscilla and my parents would have knocked some sense into their Lisa Marie. (and don’t write and remind me that my chronology is wrong…I’m just thinking).

Today, all kids should turn out perfectly. There’s TV and numerous talk shows that tell them what to do, how to do it, and how to fix it, if by some misfortune they mess it up.

There’s OPRAH, DR. PHIL, DR. RUTH, MARTHA, JUDGE JUDY, and last but not least, JESUS. (I purposely put Him last, because He’s forgiving.) If any of them had been my SWITCHEROO parents, I would have gotten much smarter, much faster.

All of the above (except maybe Elvis), are people I would have looked up to, good role models, with sterling advice that I would have followed to the letter. Obediently.

Well, NOW, I listen to all of them, but it’s a little too late for Oprah, Dr. Phil, Dr. Ruth, Martha & Judge Judy to actually affect my daily life, but they are all entertaining and informative.

Jesus on the other hand, may have a message for me.